My heart muscles are exhausted.

stressed.frustated.afraid

r/s probs
prelim results
worries
of
the
As

sigh.

Im sorry of my attitude towards you
im sorry of the cold treatment
im sorry of the sacarstic remarks i made
im sorry of my ungrateful behaviour
im sorry for not appreciating your care
im sorry for not appreciating your efforts
im sorry for not appreciating your concerns
im sorry for being appreciative towards ur sacrifices
im sorry for not being understanding
im sorry for being immature
im sorry for being insensitive
im sorry for throwing my temper at you
im sorry for ignoring you
im sorry for being unreasonable at times
im sorry for not being able to make you feel happy
im sorry for making you angry
im sorry for not caring you enough
im sorry for not showering you with more love
im sorry for wasting your time by quarrelling
im sorry for commenting on you critically
im sorry for not listening to you
im sorry if i had taken you for granted
im sorry for making you upset of embarrasement issue
im sorry for not being there when you need me
im sorry for keeping things from you
im sorry for making you feel inferior
im sorry for not being a good girlfriend

but deep down i do love you very much,
i dont want to lose you.
yes im scared and troubled.
the past mnth quarrels has to stop.
does something have to happen before everything stops and be alright.
do take care my dear boy of ur health.

my heart ached again.
ill leave it alone since u're are unwell.
lets try to move on.

was thinking of separating of a short period of time frm now till all exams. thinking if it would be better. but i highly doubt so, it is just going to pull me in deeper, causing more aches.

honestly, i forgo-ed my priority of school for you. but its not obv. my mind its just you. studies are idk.

no crying tonight elaine!

got scolded by the father for having insufficient sleep, come on 4hrs a day is sufficient.
what to do with shit ass results.

im trying hard to understand, but evidently im failing miserably.
even the love is not felt, see how depressing can that be.
further pointing to a deeper failure.
really elaine.
no idea why im crying again.

hmm im okay i suppose.